Sunday, April 12, 2009

What to do with a guy who doesn't really see the need in giving flowers or cards etc?

I am dating a very sweet, respectful guy. We just celeberated our one month anniversary. B/c it%26#039;s only been one month, I decided to make him a small, home made (personalized) card, as a nice gesture for the occassion. He did not give me a card or anything but did take me out and pay for a nice dinner. I do not mind NOT getting anything from him--as he did pay for dinner and it%26#039;s only been one month. However, some of my friends are telling me that he should have given me something (i.e. a card or gift or flowers etc). I would think that for more important milestones, my guy would actually do something, therefore I do not feel the need to make a scene over a month anniversary. Any thoughts on this scenario? Are my friends being overly critical or should I say something to my guy?

What to do with a guy who doesn%26#039;t really see the need in giving flowers or cards etc?
I%26#039;d say your friends all sound like border-line personalities and I would listen very carefully to all there expectations, ridicule, and controlling that way your new boyfriend will dump you and you%26#039;ll be back in the market looking for someone new in no time at all and then all your so-called friends will disappear!!!
Reply:if you want him to celebrate things like this you really need to tell him ahead of time in a nice, nonthreatening way. please don%26#039;t make him read your mind to find out things that are important to you
Reply:Don%26#039;t say anything to him...just continue to make him cards and do sweet little things like that for him. It%26#039;s still early on, and he may have cute stuff planned for later on in your relationship!


What would your friends have you tell him anyway, %26quot;hey, you need to buy me a card?%26quot; You cant demand thoughtfulness. I have learned this. You can set an example through your actions and hopefully he will follow your example.


I think your friends in this case are being overly critical, which makes sense because they love you!



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What to do with a guy who doesn't really see the need in giving flowers or cards etc?

I am dating a very sweet, respectful guy. We just celeberated our one month anniversary. B/c it%26#039;s only been one month, I decided to make him a small, home made (personalized) card, as a nice gesture for the occassion. He did not give me a card or anything but did take me out and pay for a nice dinner. I do not mind NOT getting anything from him--as he did pay for dinner and it%26#039;s only been one month. However, some of my friends are telling me that he should have given me something (i.e. a card or gift or flowers etc). I would think that for more important milestones, my guy would actually do something, therefore I do not feel the need to make a scene over a month anniversary. Any thoughts on this scenario? Are my friends being overly critical or should I say something to my guy?





P.S. I already asked this question before, but am looking for more opinions.

What to do with a guy who doesn%26#039;t really see the need in giving flowers or cards etc?
it sounds like we are dating the same guy!!! i had the same problem at one time. my guy was really sweet but was lacking in the romance department. a lot of guys don%26#039;t realize that women truly appreciate small thoughtful gestures. i talked to my guy and told him that while i do appreciate the things he does for me (buying me dinner, taking me out on the town,e tc) i would like for him to do smaller things to let me know he%26#039;s care. since that convo, he has really stepped up to the plate! so, if this situation bothers you, talk to your guy. if not, forget what your friends say.





also, stop telling your friends about everything that happens between you and your man. sometimes, they will not always steer you in the right direction.
Reply:My opinion is that you must be about 14 years old to celebrate a 1 month anniversary and worry about what your friends say.
Reply:He did get you something a full tummy. Guys don%26#039;t get all involved in anniversaries. I do think your friends are over reacting I mean it%26#039;s a month for crying out loud.
Reply:really would not read too much into this. he probably feels that a card which will eventually be discarded and flowers will eventually die is just ironic. and feels that it would e ebtter actually doing soemthing with you too create memories of you and him together.


dont worry it is a good thing. he is just more of the do stuff with than do stuff for u type of guy which is good.
Reply:Well, as a guy, I don%26#039;t understand this thing about one month anniversaries. I mean, I can understand a year, but monthly anniversaries are just too much. It just feels like saying %26quot;Phew, we made it to a month%26quot;.





I%26#039;d do something amazingly nice for her, on the first anniversary, and in the meantime give her flowers, and random cards to know that she%26#039;s on my thoughts.





Now that said, maybe he is a different kinda guy. There are many variations of us, actually :) So, talk to him... casually bring up the conversation of anniversaries and ask him how you should plan to celebrate your anniversary. It will give you the chance to open up and discuss more on whats going on inside...





This is nothing critical at all. Don%26#039;t scare the poor guy away :)
Reply:no, u should not say anything. ur friends r being overcritical. it is a 1 month aniversary, hes not proposing and ur not married. As u said he bought u a nice dinner and u were happy. So leave it at that! Do not take all ur relationship advice from ur friends. You have to follow YOUR heart and YOUR head or else u will fail.
Reply:Send yourself flowers and then tell him %26quot;thank you so much for the flowers you sent me! The card said anonymous - but I know it just HAD to be you! You are the sweetest man alive!!!%26quot; Maybe he%26#039;ll get the idea and be a little jealous at the same time!!
Reply:your Friends are too critical .. romance is not doing the sweet things on %26quot;critical times%26quot; but saying how beautiful he finds you every day and things along those lines, how long you have been together should not be as important as how much you care for one another
Reply:It%26#039;s not the object he gives you but the time and love. What are flowers something to waste money on there going to die with time you want something that is going to last with the relationship. What do people do with store bought cards they thow them in a corner to never be seen again a waste of money. Moneys not what a relationship is built on, IT%26#039;S LOVE!!!!. So in the end a homemade gift comes from the heart it%26#039;s true love. Just be happy he%26#039;s showning he loves you!!!!!!!!
Reply:If you don%26#039;t say anything and resent him for it you will be to blame. If your feeling something tell him honesty is the best policy If he changes you will know it was for you. If he does not you will know how things will be if you pursue this relationship with him. you cant make him change only ask. better to know what your in for that%26#039;s why you are dating in the first place.


p.s. friends always seem to look for drama.
Reply:Well, I think there should be bigger milestones. One month isn%26#039;t a big deal. On your one year anniversary, there should be tokens of affection. But, just a warning, to have expected tokens on milestones really isn%26#039;t spontaneous. I%26#039;ve been married fifteen years, and it really is the %26quot;just because%26quot; flowers and tokens that still make my heart go pitter patter.
Reply:Find 1 who does



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Am I supposed receive a gift from my wife on our 11th anniversary?

Seems like my wife has been less than toughtful on our anniversary, again! Not even a card. Is this normal in a marriage?


Or does she not care? I have never forgotten, she always gets flowers, plus a gift and dinner.

Am I supposed receive a gift from my wife on our 11th anniversary?
hmmmmm


my husband and I always exchange cards and some little something..a special dinner....a weekend away....a small gift.....something ....ask her what she is thinking? let her know that it bothers you that she just doesn%26#039;t think to do anything and that it hurts your feelings....unless she knows how you feel, it may never change...good luck and nice to see a sensitive man on here for a change
Reply:oh you are too sweet! even though she may not care enough to get you something...never change what is inside of you!
Reply:yes she is very thoughtless
Reply:Only if she chooses to give you something. We only go out to eat and have fun in bed.
Reply:hmmmmm...didn%26#039;t she give u kids, some lovin in bed, affection??? If your materialistic, then ur missing the whole point of marriage.
Reply:I think a married couple should give each other gifts on their anniversary or agree not to give gifts but do something special to celebrate. Would you say that your wife is a selfish person generally? Or is she just like this about anniversaries? From now on, you might want to forget the flowers and gift and just agree to go out to dinner. Maybe she isn%26#039;t the sentimental type and you are. Does she get you something for your birthday? Christmas? It could be that she feels that you were lucky that she agreed to marry you, so she feels that you should come bearing gifts and that she, like a queen, receives them. Not knowing the two of you, it is difficult to say what the problem is. But if it hurts you that she doesn%26#039;t acknowledge your anniversary, then you should tell her that you are hurt by her thoughtlessness and ask her why she doesn%26#039;t want to celebrate your marriage.Believe me, many many women would love to have a husband who brought flowers and a gift plus took her out to dinner on their anniversary. They would be in heaven!
Reply:i would talk it over with her and ask her what is the problem...ur supose to get a little something...even if it is a rol in the hay
Reply:Uh....YES. Your situation is not normal. Does she love you? If you think so, are you sure? Is that her nature not to get you gifts? Has she ever gotten you a gift? Are there other ways she shows you that she loves you?





I know I%26#039;d get one and be expected to get one for my wife of 11 years.
Reply:Well, I dunno, maybe she%26#039;s just not the %26quot;sentimental%26quot; type. It%26#039;s not the card once a year that matters, it%26#039;s how she acts towards you every day of the year. Does she not act like she cares? If not, there%26#039;s your answer.
Reply:You are the husband, it is your job to remember anniversaries. Remember she accepted your invitation for marriage and you vowed to cherish her.
Reply:Ouch sorry for you....





Does she do something for you like cook your favorite dinner or get dressed up for the bedroom if she does not buy you anything?





Maybe you need to sit her down and talk to her about how you feel..
Reply:The wife is the one that is always more thoughtful in gifts...I think there might be somthing wrong there..
Reply:Seems like a little bit of a role reversal...usually it is the husband who is forgetful. tell her how you feel. In psych I learned the ebst when to communicate feelings is: %26quot;When you______I felt______because_______%26quot;



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I want to give my parents a party for their 40th wedding anniversary, any suggestions?

When they got married, they had a very small wedding and no reception. Not sure if I should give them the reception they did not have or something more like a luau. Anniversary is in May. I have asked them and they said that they will leave that up to me. Also need suggestions on what type of flowers to use.

I want to give my parents a party for their 40th wedding anniversary, any suggestions?
Have a videographer (or do a Power Point presentation) of photos from when your parents werebabies...children...teens, and gradually when they were dating...married...held the babies for first time. It%26#039;s like a look back at the history. A luau is a nice idea for May. Go to Oriental Trading for great prices and supplies of party favors and decorations for any type of theme
Reply:U got face a same problem like my setuation, may be 5 years ago i want that for my parents. and then I invite them to move the longest beach in World %26quot;Cox%26#039;s Bazar Beach of Bay of Bangol%26quot; in Bangladesh. and take a 5days holyday. And they seemed very hapy to gave them the happy time on 25th Anneversary.....





thanks





wish u best luck. If u wish u can try to do to go any where in short holyday where ever thay didn%26#039;t go.





Bony


+8801711455223
Reply:I%26#039;d rent out a nice place or set up a party at their house. Nice elegant and simple decorations. I don%26#039;t think I%26#039;d do a theme. If so, I%26#039;d do a theme that was focused on them. Something like %26quot;Fourty Years of Bliss%26quot; with them as the focal point. Dinner with friends and family. I%26#039;d use white roses because of what they represent...or a nice summer floral boquet for the time of year.
Reply:hibiscus flowers,poppy, lily, orchids,etc.


you could take them to a nice resturant
Reply:that is real nice of you.i have one suggestion include balloons, gold and white
Reply:The traditional %26quot;gift%26quot; for 40th wedding anniversary is Rubies. So think RED. If red roses get too expensive, use red carnations or a red and white mixture of flowers.





I don%26#039;t know where you live to be able to say if a luau would be a really good idea or if a BBQ picnic at a park%26#039;s pavilion might be better or if you need to be concerned at the temperature!





For my parents%26#039; 50th wedding (golden) anniversary, I got yellow sweetheart roses and lots of daisies...Yellow was close to gold as well as my father%26#039;s favorite colored rose and daisies are my mother%26#039;s favorite. I put 13 daisies and 2 roses in each vase. I had one vase per table and then let some of the people take them home afterwards...I made sure I kept one vase for each family members%26#039; household and gave dear friends of my parents the others.





My father passed away after 61 1/2 years of marriage, but my mother is still hanging in!





I%26#039;m glad you want to do something special for your parents%26#039; 40th wedding anniversary.



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Are you supposed to give/recieve a gift on your one year anniversary?

My boyfriend and I did NOTHING for our one year. We went to dinner at Red Lobster..we were both really tired from work and it wasn%26#039;t a good night. I thought we were supposed to get each other a gift. I was hoping he would at least buy me flowers? What%26#039;s going on? Wasn%26#039;t it supposed to be better? Am I expecting too much? Most guys have bought me jewelery or taken me somewhere nice for our one year. I wasn%26#039;t expecting jewelery or anything expensive...but I was suprised because I was really happy it was our anniversary.

Are you supposed to give/recieve a gift on your one year anniversary?
Yes, you are. At the very least a card or flowers. I can understand being tired and doing something that night but hopefully that weekend you do something to celebrate. When two people don%26#039;t take time to celebrate the milestones such as anniversaries then they start to take for granted what they have. Why didn%26#039;t you at least give him a gift?
Reply:Yall should%26#039;ve done something, but I don%26#039;t blame you because when yall make it to year number 3 then it%26#039;s time to celebrate, because most couples divorce by then.
Reply:Its like traditional that you exchange gifts but not really important. You said yourself that you both were tired and it wasnt that good of a day so i wouldnt worry about it.



make up

I want to send my wife some flowers to work what would you ladies prefer?

A Bouquets nicely wrapped or a Bouquets in a vase. I think a vase would be best what do you think? its for out anniversary I would be sending them to her work no idea when the would arrive and shes not so good at arrangments of flowers





here is a section. I like the ones at Next.co.uk i am looking for delivery and am spending £30 including delivery for tommorrow. we are going for a meal and have already been to Italy last week.


Look on there and add any links you thik she may like for delivery tomorrow though. Thanks





http://www.nextflowers.co.uk

I want to send my wife some flowers to work what would you ladies prefer?
yeh would love flowers sent to my work, obviously from my hubby not your lovely self. Just pick what you think looks really nice yourself, I would say 30 quid is a reasonable price for a decent bouquet. I prefer the ones in the vase as at least they will keep till she gets them home. I got a lovely bunch in a vase when I was in hospital having my babies and they were really nicely arranged. Good luck and enjoy your night out.
Reply:A note to %26quot;Felicity O%26quot; I know she loves lilies but our daughter got her some lillies so did not want to go cliche and get red roses and her to think I had asked somebody else to get them or taken the easy option so I asked for opinions I think 25 years is Special Report It

Reply:An orchid bouquets is the best.
Reply:Just pick some nice flowers she will love anything from you
Reply:How long have you been married? Diamond rings and holidays in Sorrento, yet you still don%26#039;t know what flowers she prefers?


If you ask me, it%26#039;s going to take more than flowers. Forget the credit card. It sounds like time for a heartfelt hug and a few sweet words whispered in her ear.
Reply:definately the ALLURE bouquet, it%26#039;s lovely. Are u 4 real? You are very thoughtful n romantic. You must love ur wife very much.
Reply:everyone prefers different things. do you know her faves yet? if you dont, go by her fave colour
Reply:Get her some pink roses. They say romance and she would expect the red ones.
Reply:A Triffid!!
Reply:send her all your bank balance!
Reply:Personally, if she is not so good with arrangements, perhaps try a small but lovely potted plant. They last MUCH longer than cut flowers and will be a constant reminder of your thoughtfulness! Just think of it this way - a cut arrangement says %26quot;I love you enough to cut up some blossoms for you%26quot;. A plant that will renew year after year says %26quot;My love for you is eternal and will continue to blossom for you.%26quot; ;) Just a few thoughts from a romantic!! Good luck.





Here are a couple of nice ones in your price range just from the site you listed (WITH shipping):


Orchid - 31.75


Calathea - 28.75


Rosy Apricot mini roses - 25.75
Reply:I%26#039;d personally go for a nice big boquet, so i have to run around the office looking for a vase and show off a little bit!





Roses are SOOOO cliched, go for something exotic like orchids or lillies.
Reply:I agree, go for something a bit dfferent which suits her decor/personality. My ex always got me yellow roses - gorgeous, because they were a bit different and very personal.
Reply:flippin eck all i get is a kick in the knickers. ummmmmmmm thats not exactly true. However i have seen Next flowers and they are lovely. Women who like diamonds
Reply:No roses, they%26#039;re just overpriced and overused. My favorite bouquet is always just brightly colored seasonal flowers. And your budget is about what I spend when I get flowers for my husband.





Otherwise, if you give roses, every single anniversary she%26#039;ll know she%26#039;ll be getting the same old roses again.





I never know what to expect when flowers arrive for me!
Reply:NEVER GET THEM FROM NEXT !!!!!!!! We have literally spent hundreds of pounds with them on flowers, and they%26#039;re lousy - they die too soon and they have a poor vase design and don%26#039;t always hold the flowers well whatsoever.
Reply:I think the ones in the vase are pretty - the £30.00 ones that are the long stemed ones is what I assume you are buying - I think your wife will LOVE them - I would. Have a lovely anniversary xx
Reply:a dozen red roses
Reply:Anyday, i would go for Lilies....they smell ever sooooo gorgeous!
Reply:Boy where are there more men like you? Just getting flowers at work is great. If you can afford them choose Roses. Tell the florist to fill in with Baby%26#039;s Breath in a nice vase.
Reply:Are you a real person? I didnt think that men like you existed. Your wife is a very lucky woman. Lilys are nice but their pollen does stain, roses may be seen as old fashoined by some, but when you think of a flower to show that you love someone, its normally roses that come to mind.
Reply:send her favourite flower or flowers in her favourite colour


Red Roses are traditional for wedding anniversary, one for each year you have been married shows extra thought,





or a single rose, with a helium ballon, to which the dinner invitation is attached is slightly different, then the main arrangement you could have delivered to the house, in a colour scheme to match the living room or bedroom depending on where she usually puts flowers





sounds like she is a lucky girl!
Reply:It doesn%26#039;t matter, if someone sent me a daisy I%26#039;d love it. It%26#039;s the thought that really does count. Lucky lady.
Reply:Seasonal flowers are the cheapest.


Do you not have any idea what flowers your wife likes?


Or maybe she has mentioned flowers that she does not like.


Lilies remind me of funerals.


Any flowers are good. It is the thought that counts after all
Reply:my bf from time to time sends me flowers.. (its been awhile since he has mind you)


and i loved the last time he sent them to me at work.. :) its always nice..





he usually gets me a nice variety of different kinds.. with different colours.. :)





so i%26#039;d get a nice variety.. :) and with a vase.. that way they will keep while she%26#039;s at work more easier.. its not like she has a vase waiting :)
Reply:wow, what a thoughtful guy you are...........
Reply:I think these are nice.


http://www.nextflowers.co.uk/item.asp
Reply:That sounds nice..The BLISS one looks great...
Reply:I guess most women would prefer red roses-the flower of love. I%26#039;d prefer white/pink carnations, as they last so much longer.
Reply:Would you like a second wife to pamper. Seriously what a nice idea, I am sure she knows you love her whatever you send. Have a nice meal. xx
Reply:yes that would be wonderful so people can see what a nice husband she has
Reply:Say it with flowers.....buy her a triffid



make up

I need some romantic phrases for my wife for our wedding anniversary?

Our wedding anniversary is coming up in a few weeks. I have always come up with something unique and special to say on the card I send her with flowers.





To give you an example, several months ago it was the anniversay of our first kiss...I know guys normally don%26#039;t remember stuff like that, but I do! Here is what I said on the card, %26quot;Today, it has been fourteen years since our first kiss and the memory of that is still brand new to me%26quot;





I am having a little difficulty in coming up with something for our anniversay, can you guys give me some ideas or suggestions to work with?





I want something very special and powerful to sweep her off her feet...all over again!





Many thanks in advance and of course I will select a best answer!

I need some romantic phrases for my wife for our wedding anniversary?
I think the best thing to do take some the ideas given, blend them into your life and come up with something new and original.
Reply:Hmmm...a couple options:





%26quot;I never dared to dream for a love so deep, complete and fulfilling as what I%26#039;ve found with you.%26quot;





or





%26quot;I wanted to tell you how much I love you but but there aren%26#039;t any words that can fully express how soul deep my feelings for you go.%26quot;
Reply:Justin Timberlake sings my love, look the words up and I am telling you if you love your wife you will find something in these words to say on you anniversary.
Reply:It may be cheating, but it can very definatly keep those home fires burning HOT


My husband and I have been together for 9 yrs. He sent me flowers with a hand written note that said


You are the light of my life, The day I married you was the best and happiest day of my life, It just keeps getting better
Reply:Fourteen years ago you became my wife my life my lover my best friend who i will love until my days are gone.
Reply:Try some Shakespeare the writer was over the top good.
Reply:isnt this cheating, like on a test or something like that








gl
Reply:I could say alot here.


Alot has happened in 14 years.


Alot of people don%26#039;t even survive their marriage for 14 years.


But in looking for the perfect thing to say to you, I could find nothing more true and nothing more sincere than:





I LOVE YOU





................have any friends as romantic as you ...lol
Reply:Make is sweet, short and simple..... Honey I love you, and nothing in this world could make me happier than to know that our love will go on forever.......... you bring a smile to my heart.....short ,simple....... very sweet......
Reply:how about something like %26quot; I once made a promise to you and today I would like to recommit myself to you. I will continue every day to take you as my wife to have to hold, to love to and to cherish........I still do!%26quot;



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